Read this Woman's Substack, and know the Pain of the Sigma's Wife

I told you guys... Autism in women is God's answer to prayers!

So, I only read the one post, but man, did she explain the principles of how females judge and evaluate men well. I strongly urge any man even mildly confused by women and how to get to be with one seriously, to read this whole thing.

I am not sure, but judging from her writing and her self-admitted hyper-literalism, I suspect Kristin is on the spectrum and has a high IQ. Those of you who have bothered to watch my video from years ago, will know that I pretty much see it that a high IQ coupled with a touch of Autism (not a lot, Aspie level stuff is best) is really the next step in genuine human evolution.¹

This lady cuts through all the hand-wringing and brings you the clear, lucid truth:

I’m not a psychologist, evolutionary or otherwise, so I won’t bore you with any science-based opinions I gleaned from other, smarter writers. But there are reasons why girls are so picky. Deep, inborn reasons. Yes, even the fat ones. Yes, even the butter-face mids. They’re picky for good reasons, and no amount of silly fantasizing about violent theocratic revolution will stop them from being picky.

Instead of wondering how you can bend half the population to your will, perhaps you should activate those analytical skills I keep hearing you excel at.

Society has changed, but what women value hasn’t.

Publicity still from Paradise Road (1997)

Do you think Topsy would have spoken up and squashed the argument if her husband was, say, a weird, eccentric tycoon who made others uncomfortable with his mumbling and poor hygiene? Would she have felt comfortable asserting herself in this female group if her husband had gotten sloppy drunk at last night’s party, and was seen groping the band singer?

I can’t think of a better way to explain the why and how of how many men fail so spectacularly with women than the above examples.

And yes, no amount of intel rage from “Pagans” that are supposedly “worshipping Odin” is ever going to get them laid, or “repeal the 19th”, even (especially) if a literal apocalypse happens, because those LARPers and MGTOWs would be the least reliable men you can find in any trench.

See how a man behaves and carries himself in public, in private, with friends and with strangers, and I will be able to tell you what kind of success he has with women.

Most men are so scared of making some faux-pas that essentially they become so ordinary and “nice” they may as well be invisible. You think women —those creatures that will spend thousands on looking good enough to be looked at by both men and women— want to be reflected by a “mirror” that no one even knows is there?

No.

But now allow me to put to rest another few myths, about the Sigma male.

The Pain of the Sigma Wife

Thanks to the perverting of the word and concept first created by Vox Day, everyone, especially Gamma males, but also some women (those who haven’t actually tried to be with one) have glorified the Sigma Male as the epitome of human achievement. Of manly manliness that every man should aspire to, and every woman desires.

As usual, taking half-truths and turning them into fictional legends never turns out well for those who believe these things.

So let’s first get the half truths:

Are Sigmas the epitome of male achievement?

It’s a stupid question to begin with.

Nothing is absolute except death. To think in such limited fashion shows the “thinker” is mostly retarded. Nevertheless, we can more or less see why this myth would be propagated; but even so, it bears remembering that Sigmas are also pretty as unique as any class of man can get, precisely because their classification is primarily rooted in their own individualism and self-reliance. Some of which self-reliance occurred by happenstance (though usually through hardship or trauma), even if it probably got refined and perfected later.

So while we can ascribe some generalities to them, none of them are written in stone (almost nothing ever is, but Sigmas specifically are a small percentage of humanity and the most unpredictable). The generalities are things like:

• Almost pathological self reliance. This can certainly appear to be, and also actually be attractive, especially from a distance. Because in order to be self-reliant a man inevitably has to become competent, and usually to a level well above the norm. Again, an attractive quality to a woman. Until that self-reliance is such that the woman realises this guy just doesn’t seem to value, care, even (gasp!) respect most people?!?! Cue: “Oh MAW GAWD! He’s a psychopath!”

• Their own code of conduct. While this is not necessarily always ethical, as my dad explained long ago, when I was a teenager: “Son, just remember, as long as you are yourself, and stick to your own way, even if you are an evil son of a bitch that kills an old lady every Friday night, you will always have a woman, best friends, and people on your side. But the day you wake up and decide to change, and that killing little old ladies is wrong, that’s when your “best friend” fucks your woman, and your “friends” disappear.” Crude as his explanation was, it’s basically true. Even evil men, who nevertheless march to their own pace, will not be short of sycophants and women. Regardless of your liking this or not, once again, a man that does his own thing unapologetically, and with conviction, is an attractive prospect to women. Don’t take my word for it, look up how many serial killers on death row get fan mail from women.

• Usually, they are quite capable in dealing with conflict. The Sigma ranges the most in many regards, but you can hardly succeed in the world if you are self-reliant without being able to navigate conflict in some way with generally good outcomes. A few Sigmas while perhaps not actively or at least consciously seeking it out, nevertheless thrive on conflict. Most do not look for it specifically, and would prefer to be left alone, but no Sigma is a stranger to confrontation and conflict. And when they do need to, they can absolutely become the most dangerous person in the room, no one excluded. Even an Alpha in a total Alpha rage is not safe from a Sigma that has (for whatever reason) reached murderous levels of response. Not even if he has bodyguards. And as you may have noted above, a man’s ability to navigate confrontation successfully, even to the point of potentially being capable of massive violence, is —again, like it or not— instinctively attractive to large numbers of the female population.

• Usually they have some measure of material success. Once again, this is not always a given, because some Sigmas are weirder than many can imagine, but as with some of the other attributes, to be self-reliant, outside of most social hierarchies, and so on, a man generally has to become at least somewhat capable in the world, and again, this is generally seen as an attractive quality.

• Does not put up with bullshit. Precisely because he cares little or not at all for social status and so on, a Sigma will defend what they consider their home (be it physical, mental, spiritual, or ideological) to the death. A Sigma can tolerate levels of stress that might kill other men in certain areas, and absolutely maul you if you encroach into their personal garden of peace, whatever that is and however it manifests for him. In most situations where the ending is not akin to a scene from Dexter, this plays out as a Sigma not tolerating the kind of shit-testing that women do as a function of their breathing, pretty much. And again, counter-intuitive as this may be, women perceive a man that takes very little of their nonsense as attractive, regardless of how much they deny it. And also regardless of the fact that as much as Gammas, may TRY to emulate this aspect of Sigma-ness, it simply cannot be faked. I can tell you from personal experience that while I might, for brief periods of time, resist the urge to tell someone to fuck off, when I in fact do so, there is no doubt in anyone’s mind that it is a full-hearted, genuine sentiment that comes from the very depths of my soul, and is in no way any kind of act. This is also probably why whenever I have ever reached that point, every problem person that was being a pain in the ass 3 seconds earlier, suddenly, miraculously, either disappears, or becomes instantly polite, and very, very helpful.

• Are often either oblivious or contemptuous of many social standards. People are mostly stupid and irrelevant, so a Sigma does not concern himself pretty much at all with what the opinions of others about him might be. Our main operating principle might be reduced to doing the minimum necessary to not be hunted down with torches and pitchforks, staying out of jail, and having as few people as possible bug us with their stupid questions, opinion, mouth noises and general incompetence and idiocy.

Now put those traits all in one person, and sure, from afar it looks so cool, right?

I mean, James Bond is a Sigma! (well, except he’s a government flunky, but we can put that down to his being able to pretty much do what he wants in exchange for his services, so it works) isn’t he cool? Yeah… notice how a lot of the women he gets involved with die? That’s the movies’ metaphorical representation of what one might assume happens to a Sigma wife a couple of times a day internally.

Or take the actual Kurgan —after which I was nicknamed by a group of online readers of Vox’s blog— Well, that guy, the one from the Highlander film, is certainly a Sigma. No one can deny he marches to his own beat. Now imagine bringing that guy to a cocktail party of your closest friends as your guest.

Feel the cringe? And that’s probably you, as a male reader. Now imagine being married to him. In like… the real world. And remember that a woman sees herself as a reflection of her man.

It takes a very unusual woman to be happy and content with a Sigma husband.

Sure, the bouts of positives can sometimes be real peaks of such brilliance that any woman would be flattered to bask in that light of it for a bit.

But the bouts of social shame that a Sigma can potentially make his wife experience (whether it’s real or not in the end is a bit subjective)² are probably not described in Dante’s lowest circles of Hell for the sheer shame of it.

The fact remains that what another man might navigate as a much smoother outcome, whether consciously or not, a Sigma can sometimes treat as an impromptu opportunity to test the effect of live hand-grenades in polite company. And bad enough sometimes he will do this without even realising that live hand-grenades and cocktail parties do not mix, that’s a horrific enough concept to digest for anyone… but sometimes the absolute maniac will do it on purpose, full knowing what live hand-grenades in confined spaces do to soft humans.³ I mean he will have a reason for doing it, a good reason (to him anyway), maybe even a very valid reason too, but most women you see will just not appreciate it.⁴

So… while I doubt it will make a dent in the idiotic “manosphere”, of which I most certainly do not consider myself a part of, nor any kind of spokesman for (God forbid!), perhaps, if people read this, the Gammas and other idolaters of the Sigma label, might just realise that:

• No you can’t fake it.

• Yes women (and everyone else too, but women especially) can tell if you are.

• Most women will be attracted and may even get involved initially with a Sigma, they may be their hidden mistress for years, but very few would actually be able to live with the inevitable misanthropy that Sigmas mostly have as part of their DNA.

James Bond is sexy to be seen with. Not so much to be married to.

Ditto Hannibal Lecter. It may be fun to be seen in the company of a sophisticated, educated, successful man with a refined palate in the presence of people you want to impress. A little less fun when you get home and realise he eats people. And a LOT less fun when the neighbours find out and then go missing.

Which is not to say all Sigmas are psychopaths, just to be clear. In fact I would guess proportionally less of them are mentally unstable than average by a good factor, because if you are not well-acquainted with reality it’s pretty difficult to be self-sufficient and do so successfully.

So… spare a thought for those brave women that take on the task of making a life with what might be the modern equivalent of a Pirate. It’s not about the legality of things, Sigmas are not necessarily any more criminally inclined than anyone else, as far as I can tell, it’s more about the social effect.

Some people might think pirates are cool. But polite society in general shuns them (even if more than a few of the “polite society” wives of very respectable “polite society” husbands will have been in very compromising positions with certain pirates).

And it is that general aura of “social outsider” that a Sigma Wife operates under, for the most part. The women who have it in them to be comfortable with such an aura are few, generally speaking, but I have also found that those who are, or at least become it, are women that are far more interesting than average. By a lot.

I used to have a Sigma boss that was married to such a woman, and I worked with them both. I can’t help but remember that man fondly, and sometimes am a little sad I lost touch with him. And his wife was truly a woman I deeply respected and enjoyed the company of. The conversations I had with her were always either entertaining, funny, or interesting. She was never superficial yet had the ability to make light of the most difficult situations in a way that defused things better than most hostage negotiators might do. And if and when she got pissed off, woe betide the poor bastard that did it, because she would cut him down in that British cold-venom delivery that can be worse than being simply shot. And immediately after, in case the unfortunate individual was too insensitive to have been adequately wounded in his ego, along would come her husband with all the subtlety of a raging bull on cocaine that was also on fire.

He once threw a client’s consultant off site permanently and with language that would make a sailor blush because the man had made a half-joking comment that one of the plasterer’s hi-viz vests was dirty.

It was quite a spectacle, and workmen within hearing distance (elevated by the volume his rant was delivered at) downed tools to look on in stunned silence at this project manager telling a man twice his size, who also worked for the client, what a so and so he was and how dare he talk to one of his men that way, and to get his X and Y face and arse off his site right the fuck now and never show his face here again…and so on…

The only sound that was being heard aside him ranting, and the other guy looking like a deer in headlights trying to apologise and not being allowed to, was me, basically trying to stifle a belly laugh.

Two minutes later, back in the office on site, he was all smiles and saying how he didn’t like that C*** from day one and now he wouldn’t have to see him again. The whole show was both real AND a show. And it was a masterful psychological play on the client too, that very few men would have managed to pull off successfully without possibly ending up in court, never mind completing the project at a profit, and even more miraculously, on time.

In fact, his project was the only one, aside one of my own, that I have ever known to actually finish on time. The man was a brilliant project manager, regardless of the fact that his “style” was described by the client’s top financial consultant as: “Belligerent”. I had to tell him what the word meant as he was unfamiliar with it, and when I did he smiled proudly. On that project I believe I had been described as “Intransigent”, by the same man. But that project finished on time and made a very healthy profit, and the client remained a repeat client.

But try to understand that the average woman (who in this case remember: also worked in the same office with us) would absolutely shrivel in shame and possibly spontaneously combust if their husband behaved that way at their place of work; and in such a way that literally everyone at the company and at the client’s too, no doubt, had either witnessed this or would be told about it in technicolour version too.

Not this lady. She’d make a joke of it, and offer him a warm Ribena drink instead, possibly with a dry comment about having already achieved “model project manager of the month” in the first week of it.

Yes, it may be true that Sigmas may have more legends told about them than other types of men. But try to understand that legends tend to have all sorts of half-truths, outright lies, and, more of than not, some corpses and monsters.

And for good reason.

1. Yes, we just ARE superior, like the mutants from the X-Men. Deal with it. And no, I am no Professor X of the: “Let’s live in peace under subjugation to the weaker normies,” variety. I’m far more on board with Magneto’s take, which is that we are Homo Superior, and we should not have to put up with the underhanded rat-like behaviour of our dishonest and dumber inferiors. Call, me leader of the Brotherhood of Evil Mutants if you want, I don’t care. Smart Aspies are just better people. And I am using the word smart as I defined it a few posts ago.

2. He says not really caring and so not really even being that able to really say, because man, seriously, if someone thinks badly of me, I really do not care. Way I see it they are obviously stupid and it’s best for me too if they stay far, far way from me, so it’s a win-win.

3. Yes, I am still speaking metaphorically, no Sigmas are not necessarily always serial killers and so on.

4. They just don’t like real science I tell you.